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Carlene Tan Li Xuan
11th July 1988.
Currently 23+.
Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School,
SRJC (first 3 months),
TPJC, NUS FASS (econs).
loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.

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Wednesday, June 30, 2010
~ Dating ~

I chanced upon this SDU notebook that I got back when I was a freshman and I found the contents really interesting. Haha. So here's the main guidelines of dating.

1) The 3 BE-attitudes of a successful date - be happy, be confident and be optimistic
2) Dating is evaluation time - determine if your date is going to be your soul mate.
3) Always save the romance for the right relationship.
4) Do not fall in love with what a person can do for you, fall in love with who they are.
5) Mutual respect and admiration of each other's character and goals are critical to a lasting relationship.
6) Don't expect to find someone who loves everything you love and vice-versa - but it's wise to look for someone who shares a similar life direction and common core values.
7) Never try to mould a person you're dating to fit your "ideal" expectations.
8) Better to leave the past where it is, don't keep mementoes from failed relationships. They wil only clutter up your emotional and physical space.
9) Look your best on your dates. "To be loved for who you are", does not mean not making an effort to look your best.
10) Give your full attention to your date. Make the person feel that they are the only one around.
11) It is easier to find and maintain a meaningful, lifelong relationship by taking small steps to improve yourself.
12) Believe in yourself and avoid go-nowhere entanglements, and you will have the confidence to pursue promising relationships.
13) After consistently dating the same person, don't be afraid to broach the issue of commitment. You will simply be weeding out the commitment-phobics and impressing the commitment-minded.
14) Be sure to listen to both your head and heart and decide which thoughts you are going to listen to. Avoid negative and destructive thoughts.
15) Chemistry is important to start a relationship but, to sustain one, you need to know and identify with the other person and their goals.
16) Review the actions, conversations and interpretations that occur after a date. Notice patterns.
17) Know the character traits you are looking for so that you can see beyond your date's circumstances to discover who they are as a person.
18) Form a dating support team. Find a dating coach, seek our role models and spend time with them regularly. These are the people you can call and who can support you with activities or dates.
19) Encountering challenges in a relationship can be a positive sign. Overcoming them can bring a couple closer together.
20) Think "what can I give to this person", not "what can this person give to me".

So there they are. The golden advices on dating.
I kinda agree with most of them but I can't foresee myself every doing number 18! hahaha
And don't jump to conclusions, I'm not dating or whatever (wish I could practice a few of these advices thoguh. Haha). The only reason for this post is cause I chanced upon this book and found it rather apt for many my age. =)

Well, shall end here.

Good night everyone! =)